April 21: The Bumper Sticker

On my way home from work, I found myself sitting at a red light when I noticed that the car in front of me had an outline of a fish with legs and feet to the left of the license plate. Within the outline, Darwin was written. I've seen the evolution decal before, but for some reason, today's made me think about opinionated bumper stickers. "Bush/Cheney," "McCain/Palin," "Obama/Biden," a yellow equal sign over a blue square, etc. They're all over the place and they range from politics to sexual preferences to sports teams.

It's pretty dangerous (and pointless) to make a statement on your car. I don't think there is anything wrong (in fact, it's lame if you don't have an opinion) with taking a stance on a topic, but you're putting yourself out there by taking that stance on a vehicle that you leave unattended on a daily basis. Just because you're leaving your car behind doesn't mean you're taking your opinions with you. This is the perfect opportunity for somebody with an opposing view to take their stance.

Although I'm not one to use my vehicle as a way of expressing thought, I do have a San Diego Padres logo on my rear window. I am a die-hard Padres fan and I forever will be. I'm not always proud to be a fan because they're not a competitive team year in and year out, but I still follow them win or lose. Having the SD logo out there for everyone to see isn't as dangerous, I feel, as other stances I could take. The Padres are a pretty boring team for non fans. They have only been to the World Series twice in their forty-one years of existence and they came up short both times. Even the Dodgers, their "division rivals," don't consider them a rival like they do of the Giants. When I park and leave my truck, I'm not concerned with any Padres haters. It would be different, however, if I were a Yankees fan with a logo on my truck. Leaving my vehicle unattended in Boston would just be asking for trouble with the history that those two teams and their fans share.

When it comes to more serious topics, however, I feel there is a time and a place to let one's opinions be heard. It's a sign of what a poor state our society is in when we feel obligated to tell the world that we're for equal rights for gays. If everyone were compassionate and understanding of others, putting the yellow equal sign or the strip of rainbow colors on a car would serve no purpose. But because our society is littered with ignorant bigots, people feel obligated to announce that they're different. Unfortunately, in making these bold claims, people are putting themselves out there for vandalism and/or worse. Does it bother me to see the rainbow? No. I couldn't care less what your view on gay marriage is, but considering the ramifications for slapping the sticker on to your bumper has to be taken into account.

The same thing goes for political bumper stickers. Sure, the election seems to last forever, but it doesn't. Now you're stuck with showing off who you voted for. If your candidate won, great, you got your way. If he lost, you look bitter. If he won and he drives the country into the ground, it's your fault! Either way, there are people that voted for the other candidate and no matter how well your guy is doing, their guy "would have done better." I just don't understand why you would invite someone of an opposing view to vandalize your sticker or run his/her key down the side of your car.

There are ignorant people that hate gays. There are Republicans and Democrats. Adam arrived and gave one of his ribs to Eve. Adam used to be a monkey. Animal rights activists and owners of guns. People want to kill babies and people want to wear fur. I love the Padres and no one cares. My teachers used to tell me that there was a time and a place to be a clown and the same principle applies to putting bumper stickers on your car. If you feel like you have to push your opinions on me, tell me you like listening to Nirvana or that you're the lizard king and you can do anything (aka funny stickers). I'm not just saying this for my sake. I'm saying it for you and your car's.